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Tuesday, February 24, 2009

Two shall become One ~ Different Day, Same Argument


Do you have certain issues that seem to keep coming up in your marriage? Things that bother you or your spouse and continue to surface again and again.

We sure did! I will just tell on myself here because I would never tattle on my hubby! And I have way more annoying habits than he does anyway.

One of our issues was the checkbook...I would constantly forget to balance it and just try to remember in my head how much was there. That didn't go over well and I can't tell you how many times it became an area of contention!

Or my lack of keeping up on the laundry... I know you're all staring at me in disbelief and crushed that I am not the perfect wife, get over it- I'm human! :)

Seriously, we have had so many silly little arguments in the past about things that could easily have been prevented with a little forethought on my part.

What about you? Are you letting the little things bring strife and irritation into your marriage?

I do not want you to tell me all the annoying habits of your husband or the things he does that constantly cause arguments. I want to encourage you to look in the mirror and see where you do things that you KNOW will irritate him and cause an argument.

We can't change our spouse, nor should we try. But we can change us. We can choose to get those things done....or stop doing certain things....or maybe stop being over annoyed at his things.

You might not like this post today, but your kids will thank me (they hate it when Mom and Dad argue)!

I'm praying for our marriages,


Beth/Mom2TwoVikings said...

DaHubby and I were just talking about this last night. He listens to the situations that his friends are in at work in their marriages and just shakes his head. I find the same thing among many of my "mommy circle". So much criticism and strife over petty things.

I was single for nearly 13 years before marrying him. I'm so thankful and thrilled to have found the man God wanted for me, to be in a team, to have a partner for life, and to not have to handle all life's craziness alone that stuff like laundry, dishes, toilet seat up or down, etc. just doesn't seem to matter much.

If I don't like something annoying he's doing, I try remembering what it was like *before* he came into the picture. Wouldn't go back there for NOTHIN'! LOL

Suzanne said...

Last year my husband and I went through a VERY difficult time (and I'm talking about him talking about the "D" word.) I think a small part of it was letting those little things get to us. It was serious, I was a wreck and I prayed for 3 weeks that God would change my heart (because I'm sure I was responsible for 50%, at least!) and the Lord did. He renewed my heart for my husband even after the ugly words that were shot back and forth (and I mean "renewed" so much that my heart would beat faster when my husband would come home!) We reconciled sometime around Valentine's Day last year and have never talked about it since.
I have never been more thankful for God's mercy when I think back to that time. There is nothing worse than spiritual warfare in a marriage. I know this is the case because I was on the verge of doing some big things in the church and those plans were crushed because of the happenings in my marriage.
Being married is a beautiful gift from God, but STAYING married entails work, prayer and forgivenss on a daily basis.

Praise and Coffee said...

Beth, great motivation!!
That is so cool, thank you for sharing it!

SunnySusan said...


I am just in shock that you are not superwoman!!!!
I am glad you are NOT!!! That would make me feel very bad....when I look at my Mt Washmore!!!

Great post and a good encouragement to change myself!!!


He & Me + 3 said...

Oh are preaching right to me. I do need to work on me instead of always trying to get him to conform. Great insight.

ValAnn said...

I am there with Suzanne. I also went through a really rough patch almost 2 years ago now. We had some heated arguments and it almost always originated over the "little stuff" and the grew to the point where it was everything that each of us had ever done.

I finally realized after much prayer that I had to be the one to change. He had some changes to, but I couldn't just sit back and hope for him to change without me changing as well.

Waking up each day and asking the Lord to look at the "good" in your marriage changed our lives. It also made it easier to change those little things as I wasn't holding a grudge over some little thing that I felt he did...

km said...

This is a good one. It's so much easier to see where he's bugging me. I know I bug him too.

My package arrived at the end of a very busy week. I'm just now getting around to a Thank You! I'm enjoying a cup of coffee right now.

Blessings to you.

Anonymous said...


I needed that.

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Anonymous said...

Great post; though I am still young =), I totally understand what you are saying.

Norma said...

Oh yah..I totally get the check book thing! Tom does not like suprises in the check book!
The little arguments can add up to "THE BIG ONE". I believe that I have one of the most passive, kindest & loving man I know, but I can do somethings that irritates him.
It is difficult to live together in harmony, but we try to focus on living together in unity with Christ. Tom nor I are perfect, and sometimes the lil things are stemmed from something else, that has nothing to do with each other.
Thank God Love covers a multitude of sins. God knows I have a lot of them!
Once again..good post Sue. Love ya!

Kristie Corpus said...

Hilarious! How is it that you annoy your husband in the same way that I annoy mine? checkbook, laundry....identical issues. I'm working on those.

They probably think it is some kind of conspiracy! LOL

Monkey Giggles said...

Is that Norma I see in the first picture, on her knees?

Quiltingranny said...

Great Post! I love my hubby more today than ever and more tomorrow I am sure, but we all have those little things that drive us nuts! We have turned ours into jokes and by laughing, we have dealt with many of our problems!

Bree said...

Amen to this! Agreeing to be accountable to this to my precious Lord! Hubby continually has to ask me to do things- and I need to take them seriously as it is a way he feels loved, it places trust in his heart and I'm showing our children how to be respectful and obedient. By loving my husband and children I am also loving my Father. Precious post-thank you:)

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