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Tuesday, June 9, 2009

Domestic violence could be happening in your neighborhood~ will you help?

A couple of months ago I attended a "Girls Night Out" to help fight domestic violence. The stories and statistics of that evening have haunted me ever since.

In Southwest Michigan alone, 56 women were killed due to domestic violence in 2008.
That number is staggering, one woman a week.

This is not just in marriage but dating and even teen-dating relationships.
Forty percent of girls age 14 to 17 report knowing someone their age who has been hit or beaten by a boyfriend. (Children Now/Kaiser Permanente poll, December 1995)

The subject has been heavy on my heart and I plan to have information available at the Praise and Coffee Nights about how to seek help if a woman is in this situation.

The truth is that this is happening at an alarming rate and we need to be prepared to know how to help women. Yes, we need to pray for them and for their marriages, but should never encourage a woman to go back into an abusive situation. Being abused is not what being a Godly wife is about.

Abuse is a pattern of coercive control that one person exercises over another.

Battering is a behavior that physically harms, arouses fear, prevents a partner from doing what they wish or forces them to behave in ways they do not want.

Battering includes the use of physical and sexual violence, threats and intimidation, emotional abuse and economic deprivation.

Domestic violence can happen to anyone of any race, age, sexual orientation, religion or gender.

It can happen to couples who are married, living together or who are dating.

Domestic violence affects people of all socioeconomic backgrounds and education levels. (Source: NDVH website)

If you are in this situation, please get help. Not only for yourself, but for your children. Even if they are not the direct victim of abuse, these are some of the results of them living in an abusive/violent home:
Impact on children

You Are Not Alone:

And another (warning, graphic) :

Here are some important links to check out:

11 Myths regarding domestic violence and abuse
Things to say to a friend being abused
Why women stay
Sylvia’s Place~ Allegan, Michigan

The National Domestic Abuse hotline is: 1-800-799-SAFE (7233)
And click this button for their website:

Add this button to your blog:

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I'm praying for women who are victims and potential victims of domestic abuse, please remember them in your prayers and reach out to help these women in your lives and communities.

PS: One more day to enter the June giveaway! (see June 1st post)


Anonymous said...

oh God bless them! It's hard to think that someone could get wrapped into that and then still not leave but we need to remember that in their situation we really don't know what we would do and how some of them feel they can't leave or get brainwashed. I am praying for them, it is just so sad that the men who supposedly love them end up doing things like this.

Valerie Stills said...

In North Carolina the average number of deaths for the last 3 years due to domestic violence is 85. I have taught domestic violence recognition and prevention. I have a project I did for a class if you'd like I can email it to you. It also goes into some reasons why they stay.

Praise and Coffee said...

I'd love any info you can give me, thanks!
So true Kristen!

Alyssa said...


Thanks for talking about this issue, which unfortunately happens more often than we think. According to the Commonwealth Fund Survey (1998), nearly 1/3 of American women report being physically or sexually abused by a husband or boyfriend at some point in their lives.

As a survivor myself, it is encouraging to see those whom have not personally been affected to stand up and speak out. Please continue to pray and reach out to those whom are hurting. It is such a complex situation that outsiders have a hard time comprehending, but it helps to know that someone out there is thinking of and praying for you.

I invite you and your readers to visit my website, where we started an initiative called 'Behind the Curtain' to support survivors of domestic violence, rape and sexual assault: . Raising awareness is one of many important steps we can take to end violence in our communities.

Unknown said...

As Self Storage Property Managers my husband and I have had lots of experience with women fleeing abusive men and women.
We found a kind mover and worked with them to get these ladies and their items out of the home.
I would usually spend about a hour with these ladies..reassuring them that we weren't going to be giving out their location.
This experience has really opened our eyes and hearts.
We've acted as a liason with our tenants when donating furniture to the local domestic violence organization.
I really appreciate your post and will definitely provide a link.
Thank you.

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